..:[ it's hurt... ]:..
balik kg ari khamis. mlm tu kat umah borak ngan cik. byk yg kami borak. lame x borak panjang. borak sampai 5pg.
dr kisah adik² aku, family, sampai la kisah² lame. kisah arwah ayah, kisah ayah aku skarang...
my mother have told me this one thing. one thing i could never thot before. one thing that's hurt me so much.
aku frust amat... aku x leh terima tp depan cik x setitis airmata pon yg aku tunjuk.. tp hati aku rase sakit sgt...
i'm just 8 on the day he's died. but still i got memories of those days. dan memori 15thn dulu tu menyangkal semua kenyataan yg baru aku terima!
aku ingat lagi, samar².. picnic kat pantai, main layang², puding cik buat utk gantikan besday kek ayah aku, epi amat bile dpt jln2 ngan ayah sbb ayah slalu sibuk ngan kerja, senyuman ayah, pelukan ayah.. aku ingat ayah.. aku ingat ayah... damn, i remember too much. i used to love my memories with him... i love watching him from our family album.. :'(
still this is unacceptable! i hate to know that my mother isn't the only one! i hate to know that she've been so badly hurt despite those smiles i used to remember! i hate to heard those words came out from my mother...
this is too much...
semua dah berlalu, even ayah aku pon da tak de.. naper aku sedih sgt? bukan ke patot aku terima aje, mende da berlalu. idup kami skarang pon da jauh berbeza dgn mase memula ayah pegi.
wan nor sulaiha... i'll remember that name till the day i die...
dr kisah adik² aku, family, sampai la kisah² lame. kisah arwah ayah, kisah ayah aku skarang...
my mother have told me this one thing. one thing i could never thot before. one thing that's hurt me so much.
aku frust amat... aku x leh terima tp depan cik x setitis airmata pon yg aku tunjuk.. tp hati aku rase sakit sgt...
i'm just 8 on the day he's died. but still i got memories of those days. dan memori 15thn dulu tu menyangkal semua kenyataan yg baru aku terima!
aku ingat lagi, samar².. picnic kat pantai, main layang², puding cik buat utk gantikan besday kek ayah aku, epi amat bile dpt jln2 ngan ayah sbb ayah slalu sibuk ngan kerja, senyuman ayah, pelukan ayah.. aku ingat ayah.. aku ingat ayah... damn, i remember too much. i used to love my memories with him... i love watching him from our family album.. :'(
still this is unacceptable! i hate to know that my mother isn't the only one! i hate to know that she've been so badly hurt despite those smiles i used to remember! i hate to heard those words came out from my mother...
this is too much...
semua dah berlalu, even ayah aku pon da tak de.. naper aku sedih sgt? bukan ke patot aku terima aje, mende da berlalu. idup kami skarang pon da jauh berbeza dgn mase memula ayah pegi.
wan nor sulaiha... i'll remember that name till the day i die...
i'll find her. i need to know her. how's she looked like? is she pretty? did she got child? i need to! aku rase nak ganyang je dia. sepak ke terajang ke ape ke...
aargghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! aeiurapfkaluer09aq8w43y rauh 983y4[0
................
lepas mlm tu jugak, impression aku kat ayah aku skarang (stepfather) da jauh berubah. ade ke jantan² dlm dunia skarang yg sanggup kawen janda anak 6, tinggalkan zaman bujang, pekakkan telinga ngan caci maki org lain, pikul beban tanggung kesusahan org lain hanya kerana rase bertanggungjawab?????
i'll bet, no one..
thank God.. xdpt aku bayangkan hidup kami kalau dia xde... xdpt gak aku bayangkan hidup kami kalau arwah ayah masih ade...
:'( tuhan maha berkuasa... i guess i need to accept all this.. He made this
for reasons... kesakitan cik rase dulu ade hikmah nye....
may be all i need is time..
i dont want to hate him :(... i used to love him...
...................
i still love him... i love him so much.... :'(
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